I Must Be A Traitor.
Here's what our resident Attorney General John Ashcroft said during his testimony yesterday at a hearing in front of congress:
"To those who scare peace-loving people with phantoms of lost liberty, my message is this: Your tactics only aid terrorists, for they erode our national unity and diminish our resolve. They give ammunition to America's enemies and pause to America's friends,'' Ashcroft said.
Gosh. I didn't know. I must be a traitor. I must be anti-American. I must be a terrorist. According to this statement, I must be. But no, I'm not. I am very much pro-America and simply anti those people who try to use terrorism as an excuse to destroy our country. I've got a message in return for John, (though he'll probably never see it or care if he does):
Dear John:
Fuck you.
"PHANTOMS of lost liberty"?!?! We've already lost liberties because of you and your asshole boss and we're going to lose more. My lost liberties are only phantoms because you have killed them, John. Thanks.
And when I talk about my lost rights to my fellow citizens of the U.S. (and the world), it's called DISSENT, John. I know you call it scare mongering because it's contrary to your conservative republican agenda, but it's not. It's called my right to FREEDOM OF SPEECH. If you haven't gotten around to reading the constitution yet, it's in the Amendments section... it's the fucking first on the list. Check it out.
National unity? I can barely contain myself while writing this. I hate you. I hate your boss. I hate politics-as-usual Republicans of all stripes, justifying divisive and horrible policies as a war or terrorism. It's not a war on terrorists, John, it's a war on us. And you know it. Until only the white and the rich have everything, you Republicans won't be happy. You fucking elitists� only American citizens can now work for airports, hey? Gosh, which Republican thought that one up? Aren't you all happy? 5,000 people died so you can put your agenda first on the list and no one says a thing.
Well I'm saying something right now.
I'm not part of that 90% of the nation that thinks that your fuckhead boss is doing a good job. In fact, I believe that Bush is an incompetent jerk whose policies are only going to weaken this country and cause more pain and suffering in the long run. I wish you people would admit that just because he happened to have had the "luck" to be president when something horrible happened to our country doesn't suddenly mean he's capable or worthy of his job. He only proves that he isn't capable with every executive order that signs, trying to rule by fiat, cutting our rights and destroying our future. Not only do I not like Bush, I don't follow him, and I don't support him, his policies, his words or his actions. He shouldn't be president. Period.
Does this opinion make me a traitor, John? Am I dangerous now? Am I somehow helping our "enemies?" Are you going to come and get me and take me away? You fucking fascist.
Don't think we don't get it John. Don't think we don't understand how, like McCarthy before you, you will widen the definition of "terrorist" until it encompasses anyone who doesn't think like you, who doesn't march in lockstep with your jackboots. Anyone who dares question authority or is an enemy of the Republicans will be branded as a traitor and terrorist. We get it John, you didn't sneak one by us. Nice try, though.
By the way, John, my wife wasn't born in the United States. That means that someday, without cause you can just trump up charges against her, take her away for an unlimited time to an undisclosed location, charge her in a military court and execute her if you so wish. Guess what, John? This is bad. It's not right and no matter how hard you try to justify it by saying "national security" again and again, it will never be right. I love the fact that Spain, her country, is refusing to turn over the terrorist suspects until you guarantee a non-military tribunal. Imagine that, the oldest democracy in the world being taught lessons in justice by a country that had a dictator only 25 years ago. What an embarrassment. Nice job, you fucking asshole.
Isn't it convenient for you that just the other day, the "(Fascist) Homeland Security" director Tom Ridge just happened to announce another vague terrorist threat on the eve of your testimony? Just like the other one that came on the eve of the congressional vote for the anti-terrorism bill? Gosh. Isn't that funny? And isn't it funny that only top ranking Democrats have received anthrax in the mail? Gosh, coincidences abound, don't they? You probably didn't have anything to do with it, but I hope you and your Republican friends get some anthrax up the ass anyways, John, it'll serve you right.
Oh, hey John. I like that reference to "ammunition," in your speech� it's great that even though you're fighting terrorism, you're still a NRA patsy. It takes a real skill to tell the committee that even though you've incarcerated hundreds of people on minor, if not non-existent, crimes, that you won't do any background checks to see if they've bought guns lately. I didn't get a chance to see that part of the testimony, John, how did you keep from laughing? That's talent, John. Pure, fucking talent.
You know, I read that a lot of people couldn't sleep at night in the weeks following September 11th. But I luckily didn't have that problem. However, now I lay awake at night seething with impotent rage at you and your boss and the things you are doing to the world that my children will live in. What sort of emergency powers is your boss going to grab tomorrow? What freedom are you going to abridge next? It's 2:24 a.m. and I'm writing this email to no one when I should be sleeping� John I hate you.
So once again I say in anger, deep red anger, fuck you. Every time I hear your voice, every time I read your words, I hate you more. I wish you would just go away. But I can only wait, wait until the country regains its senses and does something. It'll be three long years until we can vote your kind out of the executive office, it's true, but we can always hope for a congressional revolt beforehand forcing your departure, or a nice scandal with you and a dead girl or a live boy. Or even a sheep would be good� (I didn't say you had to get anthrax from an envelope, did I?).
Yours truly,
Russell Beattie
P.S. A much better written essay on why you're such an asshole can be found here at the New York Times Confessions of a Traitor (free registration required). But I still like my message better.